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Lou Pickney's Online Commentary

Swankxmas Aftermath

Monday
December 18, 2006

I'm typing this as the Colts/Bengals game rolls on in the 4th quarter. Tony Dungy lost a challenge, which seems to always happen to him. Even going back to his Tampa Bay days, the challenge system has never worked out well for Dungy.

ESPN just showed a highlight from the 2002 Bengals/Colts game in Indy. Wow, the Bengals used to have much better looking jerseys. Their road uniforms now look like a bad pasting job by a fifth grader. Just awful. It's funny how I am apathetic about the world of fashion, but I'm a total NFL uniform snob. I can't explain it; that's just how it is.

Thank you Mike Tirico for properly pronouncing Adam Vinatieri's last name as "Vin-uh-terry" and not "Vin-uh-tee-airy." The guy hit two Super Bowl game winning field goals, and his name still gets butchered. Al Michaels, I'm talking to you, buddy.

John F-ing Pouncey
Pouncey comes alive!
Swankxmas 2006 was a rousing success. Some thoughts:

-My cousins Fred and Daniel Pickney worked as dealers for the casino room (garage) portion of the party and performed exceptionally well. One of the strong downsides to having been out of Nashville so long is that I've not been able to spend time with extended family like I would have liked, and Fred and Daniel are two solid, stand-up guys. They have my Uncle Bernard's subdued demeanor, with a bit of my Aunt Cheryl's wonderful sense of humor mixed in there. It was great to get to talk with them more in one night than I have in years.

-The dress code was adhered to almost across the board (semi-formal black and white with a touch of red.) I switched out my old MySpace pic with one from the party; the flash made me look even paler than usual, but screw it, I needed an updated pic. Bubba the Love Sponge used to give me the business about using the New Orleans 2004 picture, saying it was misleading. Whatever. Anyway, I updated it, but there were many great pics to come out of the night besides just me sporting a sharp suit. My bro Matt managed to hook up the pics from early on into his computer and then fed them to the big TV downstairs during the second half of the party, which was a nice touch.

-John Pouncey turned into John F-ing Pouncey, which of course is high comedy. If only we had been graced with an appearance by Jon Rybacki as his alter ego Dunski, we might've had an ultimate showdown. Instead we were treated (?) to a drunken Mixed Martial Arts exhibition in the main room between JFP and some other dude who competes in MMA. It's not a party until a controlled shootfight exhibition happens!

Swankxmas 2006
Matt (left) and I (right) had a good night. The errant timestamp has been blurred out like WWE showing Attitude era WWF footage.

-At long last, I met Jonathan Jarrett, aka Double J. I'd heard about him from Matt for years, and it was great to finally meet him. Ever have one of those situations where you have heard about someone for a long time and vice-versa, and then you meet? That's how it was there.

-Kyle Stevens did a tremendous job with his DJ work, and his parents went above and beyond to help out. We had some great music bumping... well, at least until the police showed up. Parties on Ella Street seem to end up like in The Sims 2 in how the cops always appear when your party gets too big. Though, to be sure, that's one time-honored tradition I could do without.

-I bought in twice on the casino games but busted out both times. Texas Hold 'Em is my game, but I ended up being bounced both times by a chick who was on a roll. Yes, I got hustled by a chick. That actually is my weakness, as I presume that most women don't know what they're doing with poker, and then when I run across one who does, I pay the price. So it goes. As it was, I wanted the guests to win the prizes; when a host (or co-host or whatever my role was) wins, it's not as much fun for everyone.

Asleep at the party
Whitney is right to point and laugh. Snoozing at Swankxmas is unacceptable.

-Because of the crowded house, I ended up sleeping on the laundry room floor. Since I knew that I had tickets for Sunday's Titans/Jaguars game, I decided to not drink too much, and I also made it a point to get to sleep at a decent hour... well, if almost 3 a.m. is a decent hour. People kept coming into the room, which was annoying, but whatever, that comes with the territory of a party. Paige's cute friend Kendra found her way in there, which was fun but fleeting (she needed to pee, and when the bathroom opened up, poof, she was gone.) Oh well. By the way, she was nine years younger than me. God, I feel old.

-Overall, the party was a very fun time. Matt, Dustin, and Kyle worked very hard to set it up, and it paid off with a first-rate event. Because I had the Titans game on Sunday (and then a 220 mile drive to Birmingham right after that), I wasn't able to help with the cleanup, which I'm sure was considerable. Hopefully the stragglers helped out with at least some of the post-party cleaning work.

I have two days to get my stuff together here and be ready for an extended time out of town. By the time I return, it will be 2007. Normally packing is a chore for me, and I will need to prep properly in order to make sure that I don't leave anything vital behind.


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