Lou Pickney's Online Commentary
Somewhere, Someway
Sunday
August 17, 2003
"Yes I guess we need the drama"
-Everclear "So Much For The Afterglow"
"On the edge of the porch in the warm evening night
Throwing the bone for the dog I see two passing lights
Well, I wonder where that driver's bound
Is there someone, somewhere, someway out there that I've not found
A touch of smoke ain't what it seems
Dust and sunshine can also make my eyes look mean
But there's a brown cat sleeping through this day's show
Toppin' off the woodpile, breathing slow"
-Widespread Panic "Driving Song"
I woke up this morning at 7:45, vaguely aware of my surroundings, and observed that the sun was pouring in through the window in Deann's front room. Miss Priss, the cat that Deann is taking care of now (who Deann refers to simply as "cat", since she concurs with me about how ridiculous of a name that is), was sitting on top of the leather couch adjacent to mine, contently licking herself. She looked over at me with a glance both apathetic and curious (in true cat form) for a moment, then went back to the self-cleaning. Cats are quite strange animals; unlike dogs, which usually jump out of their skin in happiness to see you, cats usually give newcomers a mildly interested look but play it close to the vest. There's a reason you hardly ever see cats out of a leash -- most of them would never go for it. I'm not sure where Deann's friendly dog, Mary Jane, had run off to, but after five hours of sleep it was just me and the cat.
Last night was one of those "good evening turned bad" deals. I won't get into the details on here, since I was more of a bit player in the crazy circumstances and also since all of the involved read this page. Actually what was the worst part for me personally was getting thrown up on in the line for the men's room at Whiskey Park. This did not sit well with me, as you might imagine. Luckily I managed to avoid the brunt of the blast, but I still had to get the bathroom attendant to help clean me up (since the guy hit me from the back). Bad times on that. But at least they had Calvin Klein's "Obsession" cologne on the rack (my cologne of choice), which helped considerably. The puker, who sort of looked like my former ABC 25 co-worker Brady Gibson, was overly apologetic. I'd feel bad too, though, if I'd just hurled on someone. Plus I'm sure he didn't want some tall drunk guy with a shaved head pounding him into oblivion. Not that I would've done that (it wasn't intentional on his part), but he didn't know me and what I might or might not do.
|  | | News of Michael Vick's injury spread quickly on Saturday night. |
Something that I enjoyed was picking out all of the Peach Jolly Ranchers in the top of the bowl o' treats that they have at the men's room at the Hyde Park Café. I figured as long as I'm tipping the bathroom attendant a dollar (not to be confused with the $2 I hooked up the bathroom worker with who helped me out at Whiskey Park), I should get a piece or two of candy. You can't buy Peach Jolly Ranchers on their own (or if you can, I've never seen then for sale).
Over at Whiskey Park (before I got puked on), we were hanging out over in the porch area where a TV had on ESPN's Sportscenter. Riley suddenly exclaimed "Michael Vick's out for six weeks!" and pointed at the screen. I looked over and there were baseball highlights on, with baseball scores on the "bottom line". I didn't believe him at first, and thought he was pulling some sort of prank. But sure enough, later on the news came across on that. While Vick will be back to play the final 12 games of the season, hopefully this will stop all of the "Falcons going to the Super Bowl" nonsense talk. Vick is awesome, and he has the ability to do some amazing things, but realistically he will need a year to get on the same page with Peerless Price -- not to mention that the team isn't all that great on defense outside of LB Keith Brooking. Certainly not like Tampa Bay or Philadelphia or even New Orleans. Yes, New Orleans. Maybe I've been listening to Brent Hatley pumping up the Saints too much, but their defense looks like it could be strong.
|  | | Woods set an Oklahoma State single-game record with 226 receiving yards in last year's win over the Oklahoma Sooners. |
Not that I trust
Madden 2004 to gauge the season (it's the same program that simmed out the Falcons going 15-1 and winning the Super Bowl, for example), but in the game I played vs. Scott Massey on Friday, the New Orleans Saints defense was great. And that was against David Boston, LaDainian Tomlinson and company on the Chargers. I routed Scott in that game, but to give equal time, Rashaun Woods made me his bitch in Scott's convincing 28-14 win over me as Oklahoma State at home against Georgia Tech. I had double teams on him, five guys surrounding him, but no matter. Woods is a badass, and that's true in real life, too (ask OU fans about how he tore up their secondary last year, and how he ruined their national title hopes two years ago in Norman). OU newcomer Chijioke Onyenegecha (yes, that's really his name) may claim that he'll "own" Woods this year, but I'll believe that when I see it.
Speaking of Madden 2004, I didn't buy it; I borrowed it from Bubba The Love Sponge (who had no use for it this weekend, with him having about 10,000 other responsibilities up in Jacksonville). And I'm glad I did; it's a fun game, but in my opinion it's not as fun of a game as
NCAA Football 2004. To some that might sound like blasphemy, but I feel that the college game is superior.
But... it's important to note that the franchise mode on Madden 2004 is unreal.
ESPN Page 2's Bill Simmons has alluded to writing an entire column on the franchise mode, which I'd love to see. The ability to move and rename franchises is more fun than I can explain. For example, I was able to disrespect Dallas Cowboys fans everywhere (sorry Brook and Jon) by moving the team to Charleston, West Virginia and renaming them the "Charleston Gangbangers", complete with the "Baron" logo (which, with the right color scheme, looks like something altogether different than a flying ace). Meanwhile, the Minnesota Vikings relocated to Las Vegas and became the "Las Vegas High Rollers", complete with a logo of a guy who appears to be hallucinating (and who has green hair, too). And you can only imagine what I did in turning the San Diego Chargers into the "San Antonio Beavers". It's probably a good thing that the game goes back to Bubba tomorrow, as otherwise I'd turn the NFL into my own personal
Island of Dr. Moreau.
Gameplay-wise, Madden is fun (particularly on the "classic" camera mode; the default setup is jarring and you can't see the outside receivers on a pass until the ball is almost all the way there). But, in my opinion, it pales in comparison with the gameplay in NCAA Football 2004. Once I'm no longer in possession of Madden 2004, it'll be back to the challenge of building up UConn's moribund football team.
As an aside (and a way to bring this column full circle), I've come to a realization that the need for drama in sports games for guys is comparable to the need for drama in relationships for girls. In my last season as Mississippi State on NCAA Football 2004, I was tearing up everyone. Blowouts along the lines of 63-0, 55-3, etc. And while it was alright, there was no challenge to it. So what did I do? I left the sure thing, which was successful but boring, and went with a loser program that can't even get the spelling on its uniform right (seriously -- UConn's road uniform says "Conneticut" instead of Connecticut on the front in the game). Why? Because of the challenge. Maybe I'm talking out of my ass on this one, but I tend to believe that this is as close of a logical corollary as one can find on this issue...
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